Last night sleep was difficult. I kept thinking I heard the horses out in the pasture whinnying. Several times, I started to get up and check on them.

Old habits die hard, at the grocery store yesterday, my friend who works in the produce department asked me if I needed some throwaway carrots for the horses. I told her yes, then I paused and started to cry.

The people in town who know the lady who now owns the two boys tell me that they have gone to an amazing home. Although I am grateful for the validation that I did the right thing, they already had an amazing home! We went to dinner last night, a rare occasion for us, but Mike was also sad and we just wanted to feel better. The gal was there in the restaurant and showing everyone who would listen the photos on her phone of “her babies.” It really hurt. She has had them not even 24 hours yet lays such claim on them. I know, I need some whine with my cheese. I am completely grateful that they will be loved and have a good life. I just miss them so much and right now, my life feels very much out of balance. I just need time to work it all out.