I see it in his eyes when I go up to tend to all the sick kitties. Onion’s surviving kitten- the orange mackeral tabby is shutting down. He huddles close to the heater, although the room is kept at a steady 80 degrees to accomodate the crashing immune systems occurring daily. The other kitties play in the room, they are sick as well, but not to the extent of Chilkoot.
As I dish out everyones medication, when I pick Chilkoot up, I notice he has lost a substantial amount of weight. He hangs limp in my hands, whereas yesterday, he struggled to be free from my gentle grasp. As I lay him gently in my lap, he curls into tight fetal position. He knows what is coming- medication given by small syringe into his mouth and another bout of force feeding. His posture is clear- “Go Away! I have had quite enough!”
I try to get him to eat, but he spits everything out. His eyes are glassy and vacant, his mouth full of white foam- just like the siblings before him, whatever it is he has been given in this life, isn’t a good thing. I put a little warmed up tuna in his mouth, hoping to see some signs of survival- but they lay there on his tongue. He is either to tired to chew, or just doesn’t care. I notice then the roof of his mouth which was pink and happy yesterday is now starting to turn white and my heart weeps.
This is the part of rescue I wish I could avoid. The transistion stage when one minute you have a friendly, playful kitten seeking your lap and then the next, he is so sick he can barely lift his head. I wonder if a blood transfusion would help him? Tubing him would help, but as my vet said, for how long?
I have to be realistic and I know that not all can be saved. What I can offer is for them to have a choice to die knowing love, understanding human comfort, being warm and fed and having relatively little stress in their day. But saying goodbye is never easy and with each departure, my soul breaks apart and a piece of me travels with them to a better place.
It is so sad to read about these kitties, but it is so comforting knowing that they are with you and are loved and greatly cared for. You are truly a hero, I don’t think it is an accident that these cats and kittens wind up on your doorstep. God Bless.
hi
is chill koot still with you
Hi,
I have been through this kitty death thing all my life. I know exactly how you feel. When I read this i was like Thank God I’m not the only one.
I went through the same thing with Blackie. I was holding her in my hand and trying to force feed her, but she yelped in pain. I don’t want to know the pain she underwent. I left her in the box to get the final few glimpses of this ugly world and I sat by her weeping.
At least you guys live in countries where they care so much about pets, but here where I live in Sri Lanka, new born kittens are thrown on the streets to die. And as for my parents, they think I’m mad sobbing about a dying kitten. When Blackie died, she was left to die. No one cared. Only me, i was sobbing like crazy.
Sometimes I feel like hammering these stupid Sri Lankans. They deserve to die!
Chilkoot is still with us. He is now active and strong and playful sharing an isolation room with Mudslide. I am hoping these two can beat the odds and survive the distemper. My gauge is the ringworm. Although both kittens have the fungus, they don’t have it to the extent of their now deceased littermates leading me to believe their immune systems are in better shape. I will just keep on doing what I am doing and pray they survive.
Gandhari-
I am so sorry you know personally this pain. Don’t ever lose that compassion you have for the abandoned ones. Sounds to me like you are the only chance they have to know love.
Bless You-
MA